Playt's Council

The Nintendo Story (Nintendo Fanfic)

Episode 1: The Rescue of Peach

Once upon a time there was an Italian plumber named Mario. For some reason Mario had this thing for a gril named Peach. Being the bad that gril she is she always got in trouble. One day a police officer named Bowser came over to her house, found some illegal durgs and arrested her. Once Mario heard about this he was enraged, so he called upon his brother Luigi and they set off to break Peach out of jail.

But before they went they got a little durgged up, Mario and Luigi went in to the Police station and thought officer Bowser was a giant turtle that could stand on two feet and breathe fire. But really Bowser was just a fat man with bad breath. Mario and Luigi ran away at the sight of this horrifying monster and decided to find a way to fight it. Mario put flamethrowers up both of his sleeves and Luigi was too scared to fight so he ran away.

Mario found a midget on the streets and still being durgged up, thought he was a walking Toad. Mario grabbed the midget and carried him off to the police station, there he encountered bowser. Quickly he used his flamethrowers. He hit officer Bowser and caught his own sleeves on fire. Mario quickly caught on fire all over and then caught the station on fire. Everyone managed to make it out alive except for poor poor Toad. Quickly after that Bowser tried to arrest Mario, but Mario and Peach made a quick escape.

He ran to a mansion far away from his town and there he met Toad's ghost but he called the ghost Boo. Also there he found that this was the place that Luigi ran away to and he met some durg dealer named Ganondorf.

What will happen in the next epic episode of the Nintendo story? Stay tuned to find out!

(sorry for the switched around letters like durgs or gril the whole invisionfree site has some word filter and won't let me say the real words)

The Nintendo Story

Episode Two: Introductions

Well now Mario, Peach, Luigi, Boo, and Ganondorf are in the Mansion, don't ask why Luigi was stupid enough to run here if he was so scared, just read. Anyways Mario shut the door behind him and ran saw Luigi hiding in a corner under a table. He was crouched down with his hands above his neck and was shaking. "Don't be scared!" Mario said. "It'sa mea Mario!" Luigi looked up and shook his head, his eyes were wide with fear. "Why are you're eyes so wide?" Peach asked. "Have you been stealing my durgs again?" Luigi shook his head again. Then all of the sudden a small round ghost appeared out of nowhere and yelled "BOO!" at Luigi. Luigi screamed and ran off into the closest door. "Who are you and whya youa scarin' me brother like dat?" "I'm John," the ghost said the guy you called Toad and killed me in that police station with your flamethrower." Mario shook his head.

"There was no Police station it was a dungeon, and you are not Toad, Toad had a on his head and had arms and legs, you are a blowfish, I will call you Boo okay?" Toad gave up, there was no use arguing with this durggy. "You caught me." He said "I am the ghost of a blowfish, goodbye, and I hope I never see you again." he faded off and muttered so Mario couldn't hear "What a loser." and Mario and Peach were alone, or at least thought they were until a man from a balcony began to speak.

"Well, well, well." He said "what have we got here, a midget and a gril." The man jumped off of the balcony and onto the floor. "Who are you?" Mario asked. "I'm sorry I haven't introduced myself, I am Ganondorf, but you may call me Ganon." Ganon said. "More like Ganondork!" Peach replied and laughed at her own joke. "Not funny." Mario and Ganon said in unison, then Mario said. "Looky here grily, I'm da one who makes da jokes around here, capiche?" Peach got mad, turned around, and opened the door Luigi went through, "I don't need you anyways, I'm going with Luigi, he's at least five feet tall!" Ganon stepped forward, "I wouldn't if I were you." He said, but it was too late, she'd already slammed the door behind her, then Ganon heard a scream, then nothing. "What the-" Mario began, but he was interupted by a thud then a bang from behind them.

The Nintendo Story

Episode Three: The Confrontation

Mario, as well as Peach and Ganon, faced the direction from which the bang came, the main door. All of the sudden a man dressed in green, with pointy ears barged through the door, he was weilding a sword in one hand, and a horribly ugly shield in the other. "Ah ha! Ganon, I've finally found my way across the rainbow bridge to the entrance to your castle!" said the strange looking man. "You know you didn't have to do that." Mario said "You could have just taken the real bridge just off to the left." The man raised his sword.

"I think it's me you want to be , not midgets, you may get in trouble for that Link." Arose the voice of Ganon. "There you are! And for the last time my name is Tom not Link!!!" the man named Link said. "Now I can finally kill you and end all of your durg dealing!" Ganon laughed and said "With what, your boomerang? Or are you going to shoot more plastic arrows at me?" then Peach stepped back into the room. "You deal durgs too?" she asked. "By the way who are you Link? Did Bowser send you?"

"Yes he did, AND FOR GOD'S SAKE MY NAME IS NOT LINK!!!!" Link shouted "I'm through with Ganon, you, and the narrorator all calling me Link!" Luigi stepped into the room through a random door just as Link "IT'S TOM!" pulled out a .

"AAAAAAAAH IST!!!!" Luigi shouted, then he ran back through the door. This startled Link "Ya know what I'm giving up, just call me Link from now on okay?" and he dropped the . It exploded and made Tom "Oh so now it's Tom?" (that's it I was going to be nice and have you just thrown against the wall but now that you ed me off) "NO NO I TAKE IT BACK NOOOOO!" explode as his and guts flew everywhere.

Fin, until the next episode that is...

The Nintendo Story

Episode Four: The Race

"Dat'sa reallya grossa." Mario said, then a door slammed, A short, fat man with a twisted mustache was carrying a lump over his arms stood in front of it, it was only until he got closer that they realized the lump was Luigi. "I believe this is yours." The man said. "Are you a durg dealer too?" Peach asked. "No," the man replied "I'm Wario, we are the owners of this estate." Then the same door slammed, from here there was a tall, skinny man with the same twisted mustache. "Ah, Wario, I see we have company." The man said, "Yes Waluigi, we do, what are your names? We want you to feel just at home until you decide to leave." Ganon stepped forward.

"What are you talking about, this is my mansion!" Ganon said. "Not according to this document you signed, which happens to be the contract saying you'll hand the deed over to me" Waluigi said as he pulled out the contract. Ganon growled. "But," Wario said "we are both fair men Mr. Wipe" Ganon growled some more then said "I told you, it's Ganon under my mansion!" "You have a mansion? What a coincidence so do we! Let him finish!" Said Waluigi, then he nodded to Wario who said "As I was saying, we are both fair men aaaand will give you a chance to get this mansion back."

Mario and Peach just looked back and forth as the three argued. "What do I need to do?" Ganon asked then Waluigi said "I'm sure we can come up with something." "Of course!" Wario exclaimed "You must beat us in Go-Kart racing, we have a normal track set up for just the occasion, it's a nice oval so it's nothing fancy, you two can feel free to race for the mansion too." "What?!" Ganon cried "They don't deserve this! I do more than anyone in this mansion!" Waluigi stepped forward "As he said, we're fair men and since you're in my, oh yeah one more thing, if anyone else would want to race, tell them, we have eight karts and there is no entry fee." Luigi stepped into the stained room. "I'm in." He said, as did Boo as he appeared out of thin air. So they settled it out, the race was tomorrow, the seven of them...

The Nintendo Story

Episode Five: The Great Race

So they all slept that night on the couch and in the morning they all got durgged up with Ganon's durgs (except boo cuz he's a ghost) and went out to race. All eight of them lined up at the starting line. Yes eight, for no reason Samus joined the race. "Waaaaaaah!" Wario's battlecry filled the air. "I'ma gonna win!" Waluigi revved his engine. "Rrrready! Set! Ghost! Ahahaa! Boo and Peach are disqualified!" Boo muttered a swear under his engine.

Wario was dazed from the durgs and began to see double. "GO!" Thinking it was another false alarm, Ganon paused as all of the other four racers drove off. Up ahead Wario was spinning out of control due to his double-vision and began ramming Mario off the side of the course. "Dang, this guy is tactical" Mario said, but no one heard as his voice was drowned under the sound of the engine. Waluigi pulled out a banana peel and threw it out in front of Mario, but being rammed by Wario he was pushed off to the left and Wario ran over it and drove off a cliff uncontrollably. "Waaaaaah!" Waluigi cried. Luigi was beginning to take the lead, Samus was behind the group, she had her arm raised and it was glowing strangely.

The next thing Mario heard as he struggled to catch up was a loud BOOM and then a "WAHAHAHOO!!!" He saw as Luigi flew up in the air and then saw Samus's arm . "That little -" Mario's swearing was cut off by Waluigi ramming him, what was the deal with ramming today? Mario pulled an evasive manuever by stopping right when Waluigi tried to ram, then he lost control and drove off the cliff. Ganon was now in the back, tailing Samus who was right behind Mario (wow I feel like a Nascar announcer) who was picking up speed. All of the sudden a large figure fell from the sky onto Ganon's back.

It was Luigi. Luigi quickly kicked Ganon off the kart and off the cliff (that cliff has taken many lives today) and the three remaining drivers continued on, to their surprise they only had one lap to go. How did they know? I don't know how either... But they drove on, Mario and Luigi decided to team up on Samus, who began firing upon Luigi and Mario. One beam hit Mario's gas pedal and he was left behind.

It was up to Luigi to win this race. They drove on until it came to the end, a photo finish. And Samus, out of all people, out of all odds, I still don't believe it, I don't know how to put this in words so I'll just say it straight out, Samus... won... NOTHING!!! Luigi won te race. He was the true champion, so now that four people are (Toad/Boo, Wario, Waluigi, and Ganon) this episode ends, but not to worry! A new one will begin, there is still hope, just wait 'till you get home 'n' tell ma about this, there'll be opossum stew 'n' roadkill burgers 'n' all of the family will be there and Aunt/Cousin Cindy's husband Grandpa will be so proud!

The Nintendo Story

Episode Six: Luigi's Mansion (Part One)

After the race, Luigi took the deed to the mansion and he let Mario and Peach live there, they lived happily ever after until...

"But it's not fair! I deserve to live here too!" Cried the voice of Boo, being kicked out of the mansion. "I'll sue!" Luigi looked at Mario then back at Boo, they were at the entrance of the mansion. "Last time I checked, you didn't have an attourney." Boo looked at him angrily. "Well I'll find one and you'll be sorry!" He lied, then it was Mario's turn, Mario was smoking something strong that he found in Ganon's hidden basement where he stored all of his durgs. He pulled the home-made cigarette out of his mouth and spoke up.

"Well call us when you do, on second thought, don't call us, we'll call you." Boo gave a confused at Mario then said, "But you don't have my-"He was cut off by the loud BANG of the door slamming in his ghostly face. "Nice work Peach." Mario said looking at Peach, then he walked over to the couch and took a seat then said, "Now where were we?" Peach rolled off her sleeves and took off her shoes and walked over to Mario.

Luigi sighed and left the two to themselves, he went into the kitchen to cook something. In there he gasped at what appeared to be a horrifying monster. It was green, with a tail and huge eyes. For some reason it had a saddle on it's back as if it were meant to be ridden. Luigi carefully walked over to the creature who eyed him, the creature appeared to be smiling. Then Luigi hopped on it's saddle like a cowboy would a horse. "Yoshi!" It yelled then began to run around, with each step he made an odd grunting noise but it was high-pitched. It was only after he stopped back in the entrance that he realized it was Yoshi's sneakers.

The reason Yoshi stopped was because he was eyeing Mario and Peach just as he did with Luigi, only now he wasn't smiling. He let out a low angry grunt, then he began sprinting towards the couch. Mario ducked as Yoshi jumped over him and Peach, then he buckled up his overalls and Peach buttoned up her shirt. Mario grabbed his hat off of the ground and put in on as he jumped, avoiding a charge from Yoshi. But that made him land on Yoshi backwards, now Luigi and Mario were on Yoshi and Peach was scrambling to get her clothes back on while Yoshi went on a rampage. Yoshi ran in circles and kept trying to shake Mario off of his back, but to no avail. Mario was a rodeo clown back at home, so every once in a while he got to try out riding the bulls, he was pretty darn tootin' good too!

Peach ran out of the room in a hurry, she pulled on her gloves and straightened her hair, then her eyes widened when she looked up at the chaos. She was in the dining room but what was in it is what freaked her out. About a hundred Boos filled the room, music was playing, and the Boos were drinking Booze, and dancing all around. Peach didn't know what was worse, one hundred ghosts, or Yoshi. Fin.

The Nintendo Story

Episode Seven: Luigi's Mansion (part two)

Luigi and Mario watched as Peach ran out the door into the dining room, women. But they had to deal with Yoshi, help from Peach or not it needed to calm down. Mario had to try something, Yoshi was mad at him for some reason. Quickly, Mario pulled his hat off and threw it on the ground. Quickly Yoshi ran over and ate it, then he grinned and trudged off into the kitchen as Mario and Luigi hopped off.

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Meanwhile, in the diner Peach was still deciding what to do, she decided it was safer to stay in there with the Boos, she was wrong. She walked over to the near table and drank some Booze and began to dance to the Boos Blues Music. After the song was over she sat down on the chair, she decided the Boos weren't so bad after all, they knew how to party.

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Mario and Luigi were bored so they went to see what Peach was up to. When they opened the double doors they saw a huge mess, booze bottles covered the floor, the tablecloth was stained with booze, and there was really horrible music playing in the record machine. After they saw the horrendous sight in awe they wondered what could have caused this mess. Then they heard a thud, thud then they heard it again but saw what it was coming from, a large dresser in the far corner. thud, thud it went as they came closer. Mario unlocked and opened it as Luigi stood ready with a pistol. As it opened a bound and gagged Peach fell out and Luigi was so startled he fired a shot and it just missed her.

"Whatta youa doing?" Mario asked Luigi, "You almost killed Peach!" Luigi shrugged and said, "Yeah I'm sorry, I'll aim better next time." Mario ignored the comment and untied Peach, "Who did this to you?" Mario asked. Peach gasped for air then finally said, "The Boos."

The Nintendo Story

Episode Eight: Luigi's Mansion (part three)

"The Booze?" Mario asked strangely. "Yes," Peach said, "The Boos, it came back with more." Luigi reloaded his gun, "You'd better lay off of it then." He said. All of the sudden the door slammed open. "Cheater!" A woman's voice yelled, they looked over to see who it was. And it was none other than, Samus. "Who you calllin' cheater?" Luigi asked, "You're the one who shot me!" Samus looked at her feet, "Well um..." It took her a while... "Well, you stole Ganon's kart and shoved him off a cliff!"

Mario looked over at Luigi, "She got you there." he said. Then Luigi walked over to Samus "Listen," he said calmly and smoothly. "we don't need to be like this. We can share the house, and you live with me, here." Samus lifted off her helmet "Well I guess we can work things out, overnight" she said.

Meanwhile, Mario and Peach tried to get out of each other about the Boos and the Booze. Finally they came to an agreement and Mario shuffled around in the dresser. "Aha!" He said, and he pulled out a vacuum.

So, after the nest five long days, and especially long nights passed, the Boos were all sucked away in the vacuum, no don't worry, the booze is still here, if Peach didn't drink it all. And I could go into detail about what they did overnight to work things out, but describing games is no fun. Anyways Luigi and Samus ended up with the same amount of money and they decided to share the house. Fin.

You were right, Luigi desperately needed a woman.

The Nintendo Story

Episode Nine: The Second Rescue Of Peach (part one)

Now it was long after the Boos were gotten rid of, now Luigi and Samus were married, and Peach and Mario were too. Life got boring fast and no one had anything to do, until...

Knock, Knock, Knock Peach answered the door while Mario ate some chicken on the couch watching TV. The Pirates game was on and they were beating the Yankees by 15 runs. "C'mon," Mario said to the TV "You got this, outta the park, it's yours, it's yours, it's... unlucky, try again. IT'S GOING, GOING, GONE!!! HOME RUN!!!" Mario jumped up and cheered, spilling the greasy chicken all over the floor. "EEEEEEK!" he heard Peach scream. Mario looked at the chicken, "C'mon, it's only a little grease, it'll wash out." he said. But that's not what she was screaming about, Mario turned his head to see the door wide open and a giant monkey climbing the stairs with Peach over his shoulder.

"Donkey..." Mario said quietly as he glared at the ape. Donkey and Mario went back a long way, they always fought each other in a 2D, lazy graphics designer, game called SSB. Donkey kicked his butt, but only because they made Mario horrible and Donkey button mashed. But now it was personal, he'd stolen Mario's ...

Mario ran up the stairs and jumped over oncoming barrels, he picked up a happy hammer along the way, he beat the crap out of all the barrels, then used a sly move where he threw it into the air, climbed a ladder, and caught it, until finally, he was on the top floor.

Donkey raised a barrel above his head, Mario got in a stance, ready to beat the crap out of any barrel with his hammer, then all of the sudden, the hammer disappeared... annoyingly, Peach kept screaming "Help!" in a voice higher than Michael Jackson's. Donkey threw the barrel, Mario caught it and threw it back, next thing you know they were playing hot potato. Then they both stopped at the sound of a distantly familiar voice shouting "FREEZE!" they heard, it was a familiar voice to all of them, even Donkey.

"Put your hands where I can see 'em!" They turned their heads "Ah, so we meet again," Mario said. "Drop your sleeves flamethrower boy." Mario made a toothy grin, slowly he pulled down his sleeves and revealed two flamethrowers strapped to his arm. "That's it" the person said in a cool voice. "Put 'em down slowly." Mario suddenly grabbed the triggers and lit the staircase on fire.

The familiar voice, as you may know by now, is the voice that belongs to Bowser! Bowser had a pistol in his hand and began firing. He shot down Donkey on and tried to get Mario, who was pulling Peach through a nearby door. Donkey roared, fell unconcious, and burned in the fire until he was no more. There was another shot, but it was different, louder, less bang, more whoosh.

Samus stood in glee at her downed target, that target practicing on Yoshi really paid off. As for Bowser, let's just say he won't be reproducing anytime soon. Fin.

Episode Ten: The Second Rescue of Peach (Part two)

Mario ran down the hall with Peach behind her, he heard gunfire, a roar, and Samus' energy beam, and another roar. They stopped and waited for any further noises. Then they realized the fire was burning through the walls. Mario quickly ran into a nearby door, then downstairs, and into the kitchen. He had Peach fill up buckets of water while he threw them on the fire. After a while it began to die down, until it reached an inconveniently located can of gas. It exploded and the fire grew. Mario noticed a conveniently located fire extinguisher on the wall, that he didn't notice before when he was only using buckets. Mario picked up the extinguisher and quickly fought off the fire and it died.

And next to the giant holes in the wall, ceiling, floor, and staircase, they were happy. But it was not over yet. When the group of four made it back to the living room they gave sighs of relief, then there was a knock at the door. Luigi picked up the gun and aimed it at the door. Mario opened it. Luigi immediately shot and killed who was there, it was Mario's Stepmother.

"I told you I wouldn't miss this time!" Luigi said with a grin. Mario stared in awe at the body, and then at Luigi.

"Well thank God you didn't!" Mario said relieved that another life/death close encounter was avoided. Peach grabbed her mom's feet and Mario grabbed her arms, they carried her outside and threw her into the bushes.

But as Mario headed back in with Peach behind her, Peach got grabbed by a figure going by so fast he could hardly be seen. Mario looked up at the fast moving figure, as did Samus and Luigi.

"Umm," Samus said "shouldn't you go rescue her or something?"

Luigi looked at Mario and smirked.

"Nah," Mario said with a grin on his face "she's been bugging me about how lazy I am lately. I think I'll give whoever that was a head start, OW!" Samus shot a small beam at Mario. "I mean," Mario said rubbing his arm "I'll go get her right away!"

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Meanwhile...

"Eeeeek!" Peach screamed "Let me go!" The kidnapper looked at her and grinned, he/she was wearing a facemask so Peach couldn't tell if it was a guy or .

"Look down below you," the kidnapper said "do you really want me to drop you?" It was a man.

Peach looked down, she was about one hundred yards above ground. "Ummm," She said "can you let me down at least? I have to go to the bathroom real bad." The kidnapper groaned.

"We're almost at where I'm headed," The man said "Can't you hold it?"

"No,"

"Too bad."

"But I have to go really really bad!"

The man landed in front of McDonald's, widening the eyes of many customers. "Hurry up," He said "We're going to leave soon."

BANG BANG BANG!!! The man fell to the ground, with three bullets in his head. Peach looked to see who rescued her. It was of course, Mario. He'd taken Luigi's gun, pretending he was going to save her, but he really was going to McDonald's to get something to eat.

"How did you know I'd be here?" Peach asked. Mario grinned.

"My gut led the way." (Yay for corniness!) Mario said, then ripped off the kidnappers mask. "It's-"

"Ganon!" Peach said. "No, it couldn't be, we drove him off of a cliff!" She pulled at Ganon's face to reveal yet another. It was Scooby Doo (Yes I know Scooby has nothing to do with Nintendo but give me a break, this part desperately called for Scooby) And he would have gotten away with it too, if it weren't for Mario's lack of respect for his wife.

So they lived happily ever after... Until Peach tried to clean out the vacuum... Fin.

Sadly, that was the end of the Nintendo Story, but now you can tell all your children the truth behind Nintendo. So jam this in your brains and don't forget one very important thing, Yoshi was not harmed in the making of this fanfic!